If I ran for President, I would definitely win. Not just because of my handsome looks, amazing hair, or trustworthy grin.
For one, it would be because I have nothing to hide. No deleted emails or secrets happening on the inside.
No I’m not like Hillary. I don’t cheat, steal, or lie. I don’t just sit back and relax, while innocent people die.
The only secret I have, is that I like to pass gas. And then blame the closest human, for a good belly-aching laugh.
The second reason is because I have normal hair. No toupee that could blow off with the slightest gust of air.
I don’t look like a clown dressed up in a suit. In fact, I have women tell me everyday how I’m so daper and cute.
And that’s another thing that makes me better than the rest. I think women are great, and I treat everyone of them with respect.
I also love babies, and would never let them die. Even if they weren’t yet born and were still on the inside.
I’m sorry Hillary, I just don’t understand. How you can say you are for the children, but then want abortion in this country to still stand.
I would say let all the babies get a chance at life. And if the birth mother doesn’t want them, give them to a nice husband and wife.
Who would give anything to have a chance. At raising a beautiful baby to play ball with, cuddle with, or share with a first dance.
And finally, you can all rest your heads. Knowing that everyone of you will be able to afford a warm house, dinner for your family, and nice warm beds.
After all, I won’t steal your money. I’m not a crook or a theif. All I need for myself are some treats, squeaky toys, and my kibbles and beef.
So, if I ran for President, I would definitely win. Not just because of my handsome looks, amazing hair, or trustworthy grin.
It’s slightly because I have morals and mostly because I’m not either of the others in line. Isn’t is sad, that this country would be better off, in the hands of a canine.
Now before my ode ends, I’ll leave everyone with this last note. Please, for the sake of this country, be smart. Get out and vote.