College is back in session.
I know after reading that first sentence, you probably don’t want to continue on with this blog post. I know, I disgusted you. But please, read on, because I promise some humor, as usual.
Anyway with the start of school comes a lot of new memories, new stresses, new aggravations, new friends, and of course new roommates.
For some, new roommates are exciting. It is a chance to make your first friend at college. And if you’re lucky, you’re roommate will be the kind that ends up putting you in her wedding or even naming her first born child after you – that might be a little bit of a stretch, but you get the picture. Some luck out. Some get a great roommate.
However, others get stuck with a roommate from HELL, and if you watch Lifetime movies, you know the kind I am talking about. Okay, so maybe your roommate doesn’t kill people, sleep with your dad, or try to kill you in the shower like the ones in the Lifetime movies do, but they can still be pretty terrible. They can snore too loud, leave the room a total and complete mess, bring a new guy back every night at 3 am when you are trying to sleep because you have an 8 am class, eat your microwaveable Mac n’ Cheese(Oh no they didn’t!), and just down right annoy the poop out of you (Sorry, I like to use a lot of poop references. I can’t help it, I am a dog).
Well humans, you are not alone. You see, I just received a new roommate as well. And trust me, it has been quite the adjustment – for the both of us.
My roommate and I like to fight. I am talking about the intense fights, where the claws come out and the fur starts a flying. We fight over everything: Attention, food, toys, the spot on the couch next to the human who is offering the most belly rubs, who has the loudest growl, who can fit the biggest portion of the others’ head in their mouths (Well actually, this last one, might just be on me). But anyway, you get the idea. We both want to be the alpha dog, and we will fight till the death, or until one of the humans smack us with a pillow, in order to be the better pooch.
Are biggest fights always start with a toy. Marlee brings me a nice Halloween toy home from PetSmart – you know, the kind that squeaks so loud and annoys every human being in the room – Man, do I love those. Anyway, I’m just trying to enjoy some playtime with my new toy, when all of a sudden a large cloud of golden fluff pounces on me. But don’t you worry. I never give up without a fight, so the below picture usually becomes the outcome. And it continues for a solid 10 minutes.
She pulls, I pull. I growl, she barks. It’s a never ending tug-a-war battle. It usually lasts until Marlee grabs the toy from our greedy clutches and puts the toy up on top of the fridge. Then we usually bark and growl at her in disgust. At least we agree on something for a minute. Oh, and if you’re wondering, so far the bat still has both wings in tact. But that could all change tonight over the next duel.
My roommate also has a problem with personal space. You see, I’m a man, I like to have some alone time to just unwind. Pop open a brewski, kick my paws up, and just watch the tube. However, the golden thing rarely lets that happen. She is always laying next to me, shoving balls and squeakers into my face to have more play time, and when I am interested in neither of those things, she starts to bark at me uncontrollably. You know women, they always like to nag and pester you until they get what they want.
Oh, and back to your human roommate from Hell stealing your Mac N’ Cheese. You see, my roommate is the same way. Always trying to steal mouth fulls of my kibble right from under my nose. You turn your head for one second, and boom, all the kibble is gone! And when it comes to treats, good luck with that. She snatches those suckers up like a vacuum. Maybe if I’m lucky, I will get a left over crumb. Not likely though.
And while you’re all probably thinking, WOW Duke, you really don’t like your roommate. Believe it or not, I actually do enjoy her company (Don’t tell her I said that). You know, when she isn’t stealing my kibble.
Through the day, when there isn’t human attention or food to fight over, we usually just bond on the couch, and we have some nice chats. Usually about the best part of the yard to go to do our business, how much we enjoyed our walk the night before, and of course talk about how we can’t believe things didn’t work out for Nick Vail again on Bachelor In Paradise. Poor guy. Anyway, you get the picture. She helps my loneliness and I give her someone to talk and talk and talk and talk to.
And the best part about my roommate, is that she loves Marlee almost as much as I do. She definitely can’t love her more, that’s impossible. But anyone who loves Marlee is someone that I can get along with, because afterall, my human is everything to me.
So yes, getting a new roommate is sometimes awful, but it can also be a huge blessing.
My roommate is somtimes a pain in my little, hairy black behind, and I know I aggravate her as well, but I wouldn’t want to not have her in my life.
She’s quickly becoming one of my best pals, and we accept each other – the good, the bad, and the slobbery.
Now, I have to go before Calee steals another bite of my kibble or my spot on the couch.