Fear, it’s a crazy thing. It is something that everyone deals with, but is something that a lot of people don’t want to admit. We hide our fear from the people around us, as well as ourselves. We want our peers to see us as strong and independent, when a lot of the time, we are all struggling with something that scares us.
I separate fear into two categories. You have the small, silly fears. Maybe you are afraid of snakes or spiders. Or maybe you’re afraid of heights or swimming. They are all legitimate fears, but are not ones that will cause us to miss or stray away from important moments in our lives.
I know Marlee’s small fear is of stink bugs. However, by the way she reacts when one is in sight, you would think it was a huge fear. Just the other night, when she was washing dishes, a stink bug crawled down from her shoulder to her hand. As soon as she saw that bug on her hand, she completely lost it. A dirty pan fell to the floor and she started screaming and flailing her arms around like a crazy person. By the way she reacted, you would have thought she was getting murdered.
And my small fear is of hard-wood floors. I cannot cross them without hesitating. I tend to slip and slide on the hard floor and it makes me feel out of control. One time, Marlee took me into Pet Smart. I was slipping and sliding all over that floor. After walking down one aisle, I had enough. I laid down in the middle of the aisle and refused to move. I ended up tripping a Pet Smart employee and then Marlee had to scoop me up and carry me to a rug. I know it’s pathetic, but those floors are scary.
All these small fears, while ridiculous, are still things people all over deal with. They seem small to some, but are huge to the ones suffering with them.
Small fears: they make us act like fools and look like idiots, but we cannot control ourselves when faced with them.
The second category of fear is that which cripples us and makes us stray away from big moments or choices in life. Crippling fears are dangerous and can negatively impact our lives.
One crippling fear is rejection. Some people compare themselves to others and think that they are less. This causes them to feel like they are worthless and will have no friends or anyone that likes them. Some may be afraid that they will lose people that they already have in life. Maybe they are afraid that a boyfriend or girlfriend will find someone better, and leave them. Rejection, is a crippling fear that can send someone in to depression or overwhelming sadness. Rejection can cause people to feel alone and can often cause the ones suffering with this fear to stray away from forming any relationships because of the fear of being replaced or not liked.
If you suffer from this crippling fear, just remember that you are beautiful and special in your own way. My grandma used to always say “God doesn’t make mistakes.” And she was right; he doesn’t. He loves everyone for who he created them to be and he has people that he sets aside for everyone so they don’t have to be alone. More importantly, he is always there for you, so you will never be alone or rejected in His eyes.
Remember these two verses: “See what kind of love the Father has given us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are.” -1 John 3:1 And “Be strong and courageous. Do not fear or be in dread of them, for it is the Lord your God who goes with you. He will not leave you or forsake you.”- Deuteronomy 31:6
So find comfort in the fact that God created you special. There is no one like you, and he loves the uniqueness of you. He commands you to not be afraid of rejection because he loves you and will be by your side all through your life.
Another cripping fear is that of disappointment. Many of us are afraid of letting ourselves down or letting the people we love and care about down. When you suffer from this fear, you almost stop living. You don’t want to do anything that would cause someone to not love you as much or to look at you as a failure.
Maybe you’re afraid of disappointing your parents because you aren’t going down the same career path that they hoped for you, or maybe you’re afraid of disappointing your spouse because you can’t clean or cook the way they always imagined a wife to.
If you’re afraid of disappointing people, then you’re more than likely going to live your life based on what others envision for you. You won’t make decisions for yourself, and eventually you will lose all happiness and confidence in your own life. Making decisions on your own will be difficult because you were always living your life based on other people making decisions for you.
Be your own person. Do what makes you happy. If you’re happy with your life, then eventually the ones you love will see that and be proud of you even if your life isn’t what they wanted.
If you’re afraid of disappointing others, remember this: “For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. Plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.”-Jeremiah 29:11
God is already in your future. He has already lived it. He is the one who will choose your path, and if you follow his will, you will never be a disappointment, especially in His eyes.
Live your life without fear of disappointing others.
There might be other small or crippling fears that you suffer from, but always remember you can overcome them with God’s help.
Don’t be afraid. Live your life. Be happy.
But if you’re a dog like me and can’t get over your fear of hard and slick floors, just follow my lead. Lay down on the ground, refuse to move, look cute, and maybe trip a Pet Smart employee. It has worked so far for me.